CHAPTER TWENTY FOUR

Sunday, 16 April 1944

Remember yesterday’s date, because it was special for me. When a girl gets her first kiss, it’s always an important date.

Last night, I was sitting with Peter on his sofa-bed, and he soon put his arm around me. I put my arm round him too, and we sat very close. We’ve sat like this before, but never as close as we were last night. He wanted me to put my head on his shoulder, then he rested his head on mine. Oh, it was so wonderful! He touched my cheek, my arm and my hair.

At nine-thirty we stood up to go – Peter had to check the building. I was standing next to him. I must have made the right movement, I don’t know how, because he gave me a kiss. It was a kiss through my hair, half on my left cheek, and half on my ear. I ran downstairs and didn’t look back!

Last night, Peter and I were sitting on the sofa as usual, in each other’s arms. Suddenly, the usual Anne disappeared – the confident, noisy Anne – and the second Anne took her place. This second Anne only wants to love and to be gentle. Tears came to my eyes. Did he notice? He made no movement. Did he feel the same way as I did? He said very little. There were no answers to my questions.

At eight-thirty I stood up and went to the window, where we always say goodbye. I was still Anne number two. He came over to me, and I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him on his left cheek. I was going to kiss his other cheek too, when my mouth met his, and we kissed each other again and again!

Last night was a great shock to my heart. The gentle Anne doesn’t appear very often, and she’s not going to go away quickly. Oh Peter, what have you done to me? What do you want from me?

But if I was older and he wanted to marry me, what would I say? Anne, be honest! I couldn’t marry him. Peter isn’t strong enough as a person. He’s still a child.